Before we know it our children are grown and gone. I have three children; 21, 15, and 11. My oldest has already flown the coupe and the other two are not far behind. I’m becoming more aware of this everyday. The question that continually haunts me is, “Are they prepared for life?”
Since the beginning of time, God had a plan for the family. The family is the only unit by which our species can grow and learn. If it’s destroyed, so is the family. Sadly, this is what’s happening when father’s and mother’s are absent from the home either physically or emotionally. Children are left at home alone to raise themselves. Their role models are their peers, tv, and music videos. This is not God’s plan.
If we look back at history, fathers and mothers were at home raising their children. By the time a child was 5-7 years of age, they began working along side the parent of their same gender. Sons learned their father’s trade and daughters learned from their mother’s how to care for the home by working along side of her. They were being nurtured and prepared for life. Children were learning to be father’s and mothers. They were learning to be farmers, shoemakers, silversmiths, seamstresses, and mothers.
This was true for Jesus. At a young age, he began working with his father, Joseph, learning the trade of carpentry. Jesus was also learning about character as he watched his father craft and sell his product. He was learning how to be a father when Joseph would take his son’s hand into his own and show him how to fashion a chair. Jesus was learning friendship and social graces all from his father who was present in his life. This kind of lifestyle doesn’t exist for most anymore. What happened?
The Industry Revolution is what happened. This great opportunity revolutionized our lives! Or so they say. Fathers first, then mothers, left the home and went out to work in factories. Gadgets and gizmo’s were developed to make life easier and to give us more time for ourselves. In truth, it has actually done the opposite. We don’t need each other as much when we have washing machines and dishwashers to clean the clothes and our dishes. What are we doing with our extra time? We are climbing the corporate ladder in hopes of developing more gadgets and gizmo’s.
Take cells phones for example. They are suppose to make life easier. Ever since I got one my life has become more chaotic. I can be found and interrupted anywhere anytime. I watch people having lunch who are busy talking on their cells phones instead of with one another. Just last night while our family was eating out, I had to ask my daughter to stop texing her friends and join our conversation. Guess what? We had a good time!
That’s not the worst of it. This revolution took mom and dad out of the home and created distance between them and their children. There is so much more that distances us from one another…television, too many extra-circular activities, the internet, and on and on. With distance comes degeneration. We must be present in the lives of our children. Recently, I’ve become more and more convicted about closing the gap and become more intentional about spending quality, teachable time with my children. I’m not saying that I haven’t always strived to teach my children the ways of God and how to live a godly life. I’m just saying I want to be more intentional. I want to do it God’s way. It’s the only way to succeed. If you do too, then allow me to share my goals with you and perhaps you will share yours with me.
I want to teach my children to know and obey God
…to have and display godly character
…to know how to love their spouse by loving mine
…to know and love their children by knowing and loving them
…to know their gifts, and then, help them discover God’s plan for their lives.
elaine @ peace for the journey says
Micca:
I love this post. It speaks so clearly to the heart of a mother. I am that mother. My oldest is in college and my youngest in first grade. There are two sandwiched in between.
Parenting 19 years ago held challenges all its own. This day and age, more so. Perhaps because I am older. Perhaps because there are more to parent!
I have the privilege of being at home in this current season of living. I’ve not always counted it my “joy” but I know its a privilege.
Raising good kids won’t happen by accident. It takes good parenting, and by the grace of God, I am trying my hand at it for the second decade.
I will pray for your strength, and I would covet your prayers for mine.
peace for the journey~elaine
Digging for Pearls says
Hi Micca,
I could use your help. If you have a few minutes, I would love your input on my blog in regards to the ten struggles that Christian women face. Thank you!
"K" says
Thank you. It seems that the older we get the better our parenting skills get. Our son seems to be turning out better than our oldest one did. our middle and youngest are still active in church our oldest isn’t. I know the prodigal will return home. I’m still praying for her return. We placed her in God’s hands as a baby and that is where she will stay. God knows my heart and how much I love my daughter.
pauline says
What great thoughts! We are facing our oldest one getting married this summer. I can’t believe how much I have and am still struggling with paranoid thoughts of not having done enough to teach her to be a good homemaker, a good wife, a good mom etc. God is helping me rest in the fact that He will still be there for her even though I cannot be.
I never realized that having children, a family, a home can change so soon! When the children are small and so dependent, it can be so overwhelming! Yet, it is soon gone and they are leaving for their own life and home, just as God planned it.
I liked the goals you wrote down and noticed that most of them are really being a good example to your children. That is surely still the best way to teach.
Thank you for this post.
God bless.