It was the last time I ever said those words!
When I first married, I got my way by threatening my husband. Sad I know but true. My famous line was…
“If you don’t do such-and-such, I’m going to pack my bags and leave!”
One day my husband put an end to my selfish little game. He was standing on a ladder in the middle of the living room floor changing a light bulb. I don’t recall what I was upset over, but I placed my hands on my hips and threw my line right at him.
Slowly, he climbed down from the ladder without saying a word. Then, standing nose to nose with me he made he’s thoughts clear…
“If you ever say that to me again, I will pack your bags for you and take you anywhere you want to go.”
Gulp!
I didn’t mean it like that. I had no intention of really leaving. I was just trying to get my way. But it was the wrong way.
When it comes to getting our way or just being heard, we usually do the wrong thing first. Some women fight and nag while others withhold sex. I know none of you do that—but there are those who do. This is not beneficial to either of you. If you withhold something, he’ll withhold something and neither end up getting what they want or need.
I’ve found what my husband wants and needs more than anything is to be respected. I respect him by building him up in front of the kids and others. I respect him by letting him lead. I also respect him by meeting his physical needs. It’s been said that when a man is loved by his wife, his whole well-being is affected for good.
Along the way, I’ve discovered something interesting. When I meet my husband’s needs, he tries harder to meet mine! As I let him lead, I find he asks me for my opinion more often than not. He’s quick to help around the house by running the vacuum, helping with kids, and folding laundry. In fact, when my son was in third grade the teacher asked him to share about something he does with his father. My son’s answer: “My dad and I fold laundry together!” My daughter-in-law is going to love me!!
Let me let you men in on a little secret. There is nothing sexier than seeing a man do chores around the house!!
Marriage is God’s idea. When each spouse fulfills their role…well, needs are met and life is good.
Thank you, again, for all the great tips and comments!! Many stated they were encouraged. I know I was!
Now, the moment you’ve been waiting for…The winner of “Capture His Heart/Capture Her Heart” is Kristen@Blue Skies!! Congratulations, Kristen. Please email me your address at miccacampbell@comcast.net Enjoy!
Laurie Ann says
Congrats to Kristen!
Micca, I love this post! So true. Respecting our husbands is so important, not only to them but to others. It’s kind of the topic of the At the Well meme today, which was neat timing.
MrsProverbs31 says
Congratulations Kristen!
Micca, You’ve made me laugh so loud my daughter wanted to know what was so funny. Then, you made me think deep in my heart. I will ponder on this thought for a long time as this an area of my weakness.
elaine @ peace for the journey says
Micca:
My husband has a long fuse. Good thing. Mine is pretty short. But there have been a few occasions when he’s set me in my place (much like your husband did), and it was just what I needed. It took be surprise and had me a little worried at the time. I’m not used to someone dishing it back to me. Now, it was done in love, but it was the firm “hand” that I needed in the matter.
Thanks for all your thoughts on marriage. God bless you and your husband with many more years of fruit bearing and loves bloom!
peace~elaine
Starr says
Like I always say,’pick your battles!” It sure cuts down on the arguing. When you let things slide, life is so much easier. Most things are not even worth fighting over. I’ve been married for 24 years and it works for us!
Loved your post today. I can’t wait to buy your new book!
Love and Blessings,
Starr