Have you ever heard of Jeff Foxworthy’s “you might be a redneck …” jokes? Well, according to my family, it seems that I’m a “redneck.” After a silly incident today, they began reciting the many ways I’ve acted like a “redneck” in the past. I decided to create a top 10 list from their comments. Here we go….
10. You might be a redneck if you dry your daughter’s bathing suit by hanging it outside of the car window.
9. You might be a redneck if you hit yourself in the eye with a coat-hanger resulting in shiner! (I knew doing laundry was evil!)
8. You might be a redneck if you own a silver-plated toothpick. (Hey, I had braces you know)
7. You might be a redneck if you wait for your child’s teacher by their car after school. (He wouldn’t return my phone calls)
6. You might be a redneck if you clean your child’s face with your own saliva.
5. You might be a redneck if your tuck your skirt into the back of your underwear and then stop for gas on a four lane highway.
4. You might be a redneck when you show up at the dentist on the wrong day.
3. You might be a redneck if you forget to pick up your child at school twice in the same week.
2. You might be a redneck if you try to renew your driver’s license on Veterans’ Day. (And I thought the empty parking lot meant no long lines!)
1. Drum roll please… You might be a redneck if during a family devotion you threaten to rip off your child’s arm and hit him with it….in Jesus, Name.
(I promise I’ve never harmed my own child or any other.)
Easy my guilt and let me know I’m not alone by sharing some of your “redneck” moments. I’ll give away my Cd entitled, “Piecing It All Together” to the top “Redneck!” God knows, we “rednecks” need to get it together!