In the last post, we learned that fear doesn’t come from God. It comes from Satan in the form of a lie. That’s easy to understand. The problem is sometimes I catch myself believing the lie. (I’m not good enough) And the lie holds me back from living my life and accomplishing all God has for me.
“What fear is holding you back?”
- Failure
- abandonment/rejection
- intimacy
- success
- being broke
- parenting
- loneliness
- what others think of me
- not being good enough
- ________________ (fill in the blank)
We can all find something that haunts us. Take William for example.
Will is a wealthy man and yet he lives in great fear he’ll lose everything over night.
Janie and Blake’s close friends lost their son to a drug overdose. They are terrified their son will succumb to the pressure of a drug pusher.
Jon and Angie carry the burden of failure. They’re afraid they didn’t do enough for their kids. They failed to prepare them for the world. Now, they worry their kids will be failures too.
Lindsey has so many friends getting divorced she lies awake at night wondering if she adequate as a wife for Sam.
Heather’s husband walked out on their marriage while she was pregnant with their first child. She suffers with feelings of rejection and fears being alone the rest of her life.
Dennis wonders if he’s going insane. He’s suspicious of others around him. He always feels as if someone is out to get him.
Ella realizes her intense dislike for her boss is because she’s afraid of her. She sees her boss as someone who controls her life and future.
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If you saw yourself in any of these examples be reassured you’re not alone.
I’m not the only one in my household who struggles with fear, worry and anxiety either. Both my husband and daughter do as well. Here’s what we’ve learned.
Our fear is 100% dependent on us for its survival. Therefore, I have power to destroy it—to not allow it to hold me back from a life of peace and purpose! Here’s how.
1.) Look Your Fear In The Face.
Acknowledge your fear. This may be hard to do at first but it will get easier. What is that fear that disturbs your daily activity? Name it.
2.) Write It Down
Take that fear that lives in the dark places of your mind and bring it into light on the outside. Writing down your fear externalizes it.
3.) Speak Truth
Say out loud, “This fear doesn’t come from God. It’s a lie. God doesn’t give me a spirit of fear, but of power, love and self-control.”
4.) Put It Under God’s Authority And Leave It There
I’ve learned there’s a direct connection between God’s presence and the absence of fear. When I put things I fear under His authority, those things lose their power to terrorize me.
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Sometimes You Must Do What You fear.
We were on our way to school to hear Peyton, my daughter, sing in the school choir. On the way, Peyton had an anxiety attack. I had to pull over on the side of the road.
Through her sobs and tears, Peyton explained that she was too afraid to stand with the others and sing in front of an audience.
That’s a normal fear for most. It was a fear I understood. (Did you know I had a fear of public speaking?) My heart ached for my daughter. She loves to sing. My first instinct was to take her home and hold her. However, I knew if I did she wouldn’t grow past this fear.
We talked about it in the car. We talked about how fear was a lie from the enemy. We discussed how he wanted to hold her back and steal her joy of singing and this was not God’s plan.
“For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you not to harm you, to give you a hope and a future” (Jeremiah 29:11).
I prayed for God to give her strength to look her fear in the face and sing anyway.
After I prayed, I asked Peyton what she wanted to do.
“I want to sing.” She said.
Peyton sang that night at school. I could still see fear on her face, but she pushed through it. I was proud of her. By pushing through her anxiety, Peyton discovered the fear didn’t hold any real power.
Guess what? The following year, she sang a solo.
Food For Thought: Your fear is 100% dependent on you for its survival. Will you keep the fear alive or put it to death?
Truth To Remember: “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you not to harm you, to give you a hope and a future”(Jeremiah 29:11).
Let’s practice acknowledging our fear and writing it down. Leave yours in a comment below. The fear I most struggle with is not being good enough.
Linda says
Yes! Me too!
Thank you for this 🙂
I am learning that the only way to disarm the fear is to face it and walk through it….
Micca says
That’s right, Linda. But you are not alone as you face your fears. God is with you giving you the strength and courage to do so!
Mary says
I found myself in several of your list of fears. Though I have been a Christian for years, I live with fear daily. I do what you have said, I name it, write in my journal, read scripture, and know in my head it is a lie from Satan, but I cannot seem to get over the feeling of not being enough. I also fear abandonment/rejection and this adds stress to my marriage.
I could go into why I fall into these lies so easily, my fathers death as a teen, a divorce, the death of my second husband, the rejection of a church family, and the overwhelming sense of not being smart enough to keep up with the world. But these are all excuses. God has seen me through it all and never abandoned me.
I am amazed at how patiently God keeps putting these themes, these scriptures into my life, to encourage me and remind me I am not unique in my struggle. It also reminds me that THROUGH HIM I CAN DO ALL THINGS.
I love the story of Joshua and Joshua 1:9 has been a favorite verse for several years.
You are so right that in putting it down, in naming it, in then covering it with the WORD it is possible to move forward and not allow satan to hold me back.
Thank you for sharing and for allowing me to share. Prayers as you continue to serve Him.
Micca says
Thank you Mary for sharing your struggles and victories! May God continue to strengthen you through the storms!
Sharon Garner says
This fear of mine has just started within the last few months. As a woman heading for “senior citizen” age, I fear the future for my husband and I financially – retirement. Our income has decreased much since I do not have the medical transcription work I once had as an at-home transcriptionist. I am 57 and my husband is 62. He is a pastor of a moderate size church, and our church is facing economic issues that will only get harder. I fear losing more income and not being able to save for retirement. I fear losing my husband and not having a full-time income to support myself. These fears can sometimes overwhelm me and, of course, make me pretty anxious. Reading scripture is a constant for me. It helps to put these fears to rest. Thank you so much for addressing this issue of facing our fears and naming them.
Micca says
Sharon, I can resonate with your fear. When my spouse died, I was a new mom of an infant son and had no money. I feared for our future, too. But God… He was faithful to care for us. Keep resting in the Lord, God, our Provider. He will provided for you–it’s His Name!
Nancy says
Thank you for these tips. I fear many of the same things you mentioned but the one that paralyzes me the most is the fear that my husband will end up leaving me. We have had some rough times and I can’t seem to get over them. I will try your tips and continue to pray about it. For me it’s always a big help to visualize myself handing this fear over to the Lord. Now I’m going to say the verse from Jeremiah while I do it.
Micca says
Nancy, Every marriage is messy. Probably the most sexiest work concerning marriage is “Commitment.” Commitment to hanging in their no matter what is thrown at your marriage. I’ve found that when I obey God, even though I don’t fee like it, my heart soon follows. I’m praying for you and your marriage today.
Liz says
Hello Micca!
I have seen your postings now a few times on Facebook and I have to say they are very pertinent to where I am at. I grew up in a home where although believers, there was a lot of fear. I have fought with God’s help this battle and won many times. I am now in a place where fearful thoughts assail me more than I care to admit. I lost my mom and 22 year old son within two months of each other 5 years ago and I have seen more fear since then. I am in my midlife and have health related stuff going on as well. My adrenals and other areas of my physical body are depleted I found out after a lot of blood work and labs. My doctor feels it is due to the trauma of my sons death by suicide and my mom’s death. I am hoping these words of encouragement from your postings will help me get over this fear about loss and health and so much more. Thank you for being beacon of light in a fearful world .
Micca says
Dear Liz, My heart goes out to you. Yes, pain and trauma can cause havoc on both our mind and body. But Can really can heal your hurts and fears! Here’s a verse that came to mind when reading your words.
“For I, the Lord your God, have taken your right hand in mine, saying to you, Have no fear; I will be your helper” (Isa 41:13).
I’m praying for you today that God will make His Presence very real to you and He’ll meet you right where you are.
Liz says
Thank you so much for prayer and for the verse. I have written it down and will focus on this in times of fear. I know God will deliver me as He has graciously done so many times. Thank you and God bless you richly for your ministry to those who fear. In Christ’s love,
Liz
Teri says
I have panic disorder so I’m always afraid of having another panic attack. I have fear every day that another pain attack is going to happen. I’ve struggled for 26 years with this. How do you get rid of fear when you have a diagnosed psychological disorder?
Thank you!
micca says
Sweet Teri,
I wish I could hug you. I know what you’re going through. My daughter (21) has been suffering with this disoder her entire life as well. It’s really, really hard.
It’s like having diabetes. You have to care for yourself everyday. But, you can overcome fear. It’s takes time and work but I’ve seen others get a grip. You do that with techniques that help you train your brain to think differently than it does now. Here is a website to help.
http://anxietynetwork.com/anxiety-help-and-support
I will pray for you daily as I pray for my daughter. Peace, my friend.
Kim B says
We went through a VERY difficult financial trial the last couple years. Although God has/is good in sustaining us & carrying us through it, my fear is that we will once again not have enough financially. Please know I’m not talking about materialistic things, but our daily needs.
Jacqui Cripps says
Due to panic and depression I fear I can’t function to make it through a whole day. I take care of my eleven month old, and since I can’t go to sleep during the day when I can’t function I feel anxiety and fear to the point of sweating.
Micca says
I’m praying for you, Jacqul. Is there anyone who can help you during the day? Also, when you add panic and depression to fear, you may require meds. Seeing a doctor would change your life.