Hi! I’m so glad you stepped into my corner of the world today. This post is in conjunction with my featured devotional, The Day I Stopped Living for Jesus, by Proverbs 31 Ministries, Encouragement for Today, daily devotions. (Which are free by the way!)
It’s God’s power that breaks every chain in our lives and enables us to live the Christian life victoriously! For example, the chains of anger had imprisoned me for years before I found freedom. I know it’s hard for you to believe since I’m such a sweetie now, but it’s true. (smiles)
I didn’t want to be an angry person. I was trapped by the thing I hated most, and it disturbed everyone near me. Mostly, my family. Until, one day, I became convinced only God’s power could break the fury in my life.
“You can’t do anything right?” I growled through gritted teeth. “I can’t believe you spilled milk all over the floor.” I screamed as my four-year-old daughter looked back at me in fear.
The thing is, it was just milk. I could mop it up. There was no conspiracy on her part. She was simply a little girl and I a selfish, angry mother. I could see pain in her eyes and fear on her face as I towered over her screaming insults. The glimpse of me in her eyes made me feel like a monster. Abandoning the mess, and my daughter in the kitchen, I ran to my bedroom.
Crumpled on the floor in the fetal position, I cried out to God. Tears of repentance flowed down my cheeks. For years, I blamed everyone else for my bitterness- even God. Now, for the first time, I admitted the truth.
“It’s my fault, God! There is no one to blame for my anger but me.”
Thoughts of past failures flooded my mind as I prayed. I knew I didn’t have the power to stop being angry. If God didn’t do something, I was without hope.
“Lord,” I prayed, “if you don’t take this from me, I’ll only sin again. I’ll never change. I’ve tried, God. Oh, how I’ve tried. Only You can set me free.”
As I pulled myself from the ground I felt a shift in my soul. My heart flooded with peace. The warmth of God’s Spirit fell over me. I knew in that moment He had forgiven me and delivered me from the bondage of bitterness.
From that day on I was different. Others noticed. It’s not that I stopped getting upset over things, but something inside had changed that day. I no longer housed bitterness; instead I was growing love, patience and gentleness. Not by my power but by God’s.
Looking back, I asked myself, “What did I do differently? Why was that day different than the other times I prayed asked God to help me?”
First,I made a real connection with God by admitting my weakness and helplessness. I cried to Him, “I’ll never be able to stop. Only you can set me free.” I had come to the end of myself and confessed I was powerless to control my anger.
It’s in a position of weakness that God can make us strong.
Second,I owned my sin. I had never done this before. The blame for my anger was always someone else’s fault. By owning my sin, God was able to release me from the prison I had built with bricks of bitterness and resentment.
The same is true for you. When we remove our sin, we remove the objects blocking our freedom and our fellowship with God.
Finally,my inability to conquer my anger led me to the place of dependency on God. Once I threw my hands in the air and asked God to take the reins of my life, everything changed. And others noticed.
One afternoon, while driving my eldest son home from school he sheepishly told me about a poor grade he received on a test.
“Oh well. That’s how it goes some times.” I reassured. Glancing at him I added, “You’ll do better next time.”
Speechless, a look of surprise fell across his face as he examined me across the seat. I suppose he expected a different response. The “old angry me” would have taken his head off- so to speak. With a quick look at the road, I smiled. Then, looking back at him, I winked.
“You’re different, mom.” He said.
My eyes filled with tears of joy. I once thought I’d never change, but with God change is not only possible, it’s certain.
What does it mean to you that every chain can be broken by the power of God?
How might this truth revolutionize your life?
Thank you so much for this and for your devotional today. I needed your reminders, and how they applied directly to me and my heart. I’ve seen His spirit at work in this life in mighty ways- saving my son from addiction, healing my daughter when her body stopped making red blood cells, protecting my children (born and unborn) from a near fatal accident, healing where some doctors still say it isn’t possible and even student loans that I felt it “impossible” to pay down miraculously going down $30k when I left it with Him in prayer. I’ve seen it; experienced it and have come to know God’s supernatural power. Sometimes I forget that it applies to my heart too. Thank you again.
Thanks you for your testimony!
I read your devotion today on Proverbs 31, which led me to your blog—and it was exactly what my heart needed. I struggle with overeating, lack of willpower and I’m so very angry. I feel the Lord nudging my heart in a new direction, but the chains that bind are strong. Praying for Jesus to live through me and I’m looking forward to learning to live free of addiction in Christ.
Jess, thank you for your honesty. God wants to set you free. I’ve prayed for you today.
Very inspiring, Micca! As a *new-ish* mom with a toddler and one on the way I have been trying to work on myself and not be quick to anger. Your post really spoke to me and opened my eyes. I can attempt to work on myself all that I want but if I don’t fully lean and rely on God then the positive change that I am seeking isn’t going to happen! Thank you.
You’re welcome. Thank you for your comment today! Blessings!
I praise God for leading me to today’s devotional. It is my first time and I felt like the devotional is for me. Now I truly believe that by the power of God my life can change; I don’t have to struggle on my own anymore.
That is so true!!!
Amen!
I absolutely love this. I’m the angry mom. The angry fiancé. The angry person. I don’t want to be anymore. This is so encouraging..
I’m so glad God has spoken to your heart today!
Thank you for the words in your post! I am an angry mom trapped in my own cycle of sin. I’ve attempted to lead a Godly life, but in my own strength.
Your blog reminded me to scream out for help to our eternal Father. Only He can change me, but I must let go of the reins and allow Him to reign supremely in me.
When you wrote about screaming at your 4 year old, I felt a pit of remorse for doing the same thing to our beautiful kids. I’ve always sought their forgiveness and Christ’s, but I continued to yell at them time and time again. I know I was trying to control my anger, which I’m unable to do. Thank you.
In Him,
An angry mom ready to rely fully on Him.
Mia, It’s hard not to yell as a mom. I get it. When I feel frustrated, I take a step back and remember I have the power to restrain myself. Once I make that choice, God’s strength kicks in so to speak. I’m so happy God spoke to you. Your obedience blesses Him.
Thank you. God is good. Thanks for your vulnerability in your posts.
I really appreciated your blog today. I often feel like I’m useless and not important, but then I have to remind myself to find my value in my Savior, and not my feelings. Thanks again!
Elli, your value is in Christ who loved you so much He died for you. Once I wrapped my mind around how much God loved me. I was able to see my value and live more secure and confident! Blessings!
Thanks so much Micca. Your blog is such a blessing!!!
Simply – Thank you. Your words are an answer to my prayers.
God bless you.
Thank you, Mica! All you said today, I knew with certainty, I just needed another reminder. I struggle with the sin is smoking. There is not a day goes by that the Holy Spirit doesn’t speak to me about it. I lay it down at the foot of the cross knowing full well that the power that raised Jesus from the dead is mine. I pick this deadly sin back up and on and on this cycle goes. My Savior has been with me through many difficulties and given me victory. I am so grateful to Him. I just want to lay this down for good by His strength and power and bring him glory through all I do. Thank you for sharing your struggles@
Hi Micca! Thank you so much for your vulnerable and encouraging message. Can you share more about your struggle with overeating? That’s what I’m struggling with the most. Thanks.
Micca,
I read the Proverbs 31 devotionals every morning. But yours truly hit home this morning. I’ve had several failed marriages and I feel unlovable. I pray for God to take over my life, but I don’t know how to lay it down and let him have it completely. It’s like a vicious cycle. I try and “fix” things myself knowing that I can’t and I just fail. I want so badly for God to take over my life. Thank you for letting me know I’m not alone.
Thank you, Micca, for your message of hope!
Once I changed my daily prayer to include the line “I give this to you God, to work it out with Your higher thoughts” – could I finally find peace.
As the mother to an adult-daughter who was involved with a felon, I was distraught with fear for her and embarrassment for our family. I honestly was a complete mess for a couple of years.
Once I truly realized that the only way through this season was with the Holy Spirit inside me, I learned to “Let go and let God” and trust He could and would handle this situation. And while waiting, I prayed for patience for myself as He worked in His perfect time.
My daughter is now free from the scary situation and is healing with God’s help. There is still a long journey ahead, but with faith, hope and love – we will get there.
Thank you Proverbs 31 associates! Your words have given me strength in the valley and humbleness on the summit!
Micca, this is me. This exact situation about the spilled milk is my life over and over, in different situations with my 4 kids and husband. When my kids were small, maybe under 2, I was more patient with them, but as they age its like something happens in me. It’s like I feel like they should know better, do better, be better, whatever. So then my anger comes. I have crumpled to the floor many times and asked God to take this from me so many times. I don’t know why he’s not. What step am I forgetting? I have a good friend/mentor who overcame his anger this way, so I have been trying to do the same thing for years, but it’s not going away. If anything it’s getting worse as I am even more angry that God is not rescuing my husband and myself from our troubled marriage. I have blamed God, wondering where he’s at, many times. I know it’s not right. It feels like every time I try to give it to God without results it just hurts me even more and I feel abandoned even more. My life is a wreck right now. I don’t know what step to take. But thank you for your writing, I found your blog from your proverbs 31 writing today. I am going to think this through all day…
Thank you so very much for this!! It is something I really needed to read. I too struggle with anger and bitterness, sometimes at my children, but mainly at my husband. I try and let it go and give it to God, but pick it back up every time. I’m working very hard now on learning to give everything to Him, but am having such a hard time. I once again am in a season of anxiety/fear and frustration, that I overcame once, and am working my way out again with God’s guidance. But it is a daily struggle. The last time I never fully gave it all to Him and still have had anger. So thank you so much for this ❤️ Your daily emails have been a blessing to me!!